Thursday, October 21, 2010

We're in the Army

The ground above them was shaking, knocking loose dirt off of the tunnels ceiling.

“Damnit Sorenson, if you have to talk, whisper, you’re gonna get us all killed.”

“Sorry Sarge,” Matthew Sorenson whispered back.

The four soldiers, Sarge, Sorenson, Trips and Fin; trudged along the tunnel, dirt raining down from above them. After about a hundred feet, they encountered another group, coming towards them hurriedly.

“What’s the status men?” Sarge barked.

“The enemy broke through about five hundred feet around the next bend, we’re clearing out.” The leader of the other group replied.

“Damn civil engineers,” Sarge said under his breath, loud enough for Trips, who was directly behind him, to hear.

“Yeah, Sarge, but without them, we would not have this tunnel system to fight in.”

“I know, but couldn’t they show some guts? I mean, how many times have we seen the enemy, and lived to talk about it.?”

“Three sir,” Fin replied, skirting by the other group, who had begun their retreat.

“And we’ve lived to tell the tale, hell, we even have all of our limbs!”

“Yes sir, we do.” Trips responded.

“Well, lets get going. Be ready.”

The four ran on, more dirt, and now loose stones, falling on their heads. As they proceeded, the tunnel began to slowly slope upwards, opening up as they went. The soldiers spread out, and, rounding the corner, saw the enemy, and with a unified bellow of “CHARGE!” ran on.

The battle was over before it started, the anteater’s tongue slid into the tunnel and captured Sarge, Trips. Sorenson, and Fin, before sliding back into the awaiting mouth.

If you read something you liked, didn't like, or just have a question about the story in general, I would love to hear from you. even if it is as minor as an misspelled word or a misplaced apostrophe, it made it this far so someone obviously missed it.

I take feedback seriously, it is the best way for me to improve and the easiest way for you to help me improve.


Unknown said...

LOL Nice :)

Anonymous said...

LOL! I thought they would be moles, but this twist is even better.

J. A. Platt said...

Ha! That's great. I especially liked the comment about civil engineers. Makes me want to know what they call the ants that tend the queen and the ones who get the food.

One comment... Sarge orders them to whisper or they'll be killed, then he 'barks' a question at the oncoming group.

And I have to ask, was Sorenson a nod to Pilot Sorenson?

Jonathan Martin said...

Sarge is a complicated man, er, ant. I may do background work ups on the just for the fun of it. As for Sorenson, I am not sure where I got the name, I remember I liked the name so it may have unconsciously stuck around in my head waiting for an excuse to jump out.

John Wiswell said...

A cracked a smile at the anteater's tongue devastating them.

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